March 02's Competition Entry

From:

"Dr. Jest"

Title

Competition haiku

Entry text

In the end, I couldn't resist :) I've stuck with the traditional 5/7/5 format.

---

His cold hungry eyes
Soft echoes of tearing silk
Red fades in the rain

(Incidentally, the second line refers to the sound of a sharp blade through flesh, sometimes described as similar to tearing fabric - did it work?)

Dr. Jest
The truth is out there, but the lies are inside your head

---

Comments

Yeap the second line works. Also reminesent of testing katana on silk - which is nicely in keeping with haiku.
Kind of tough to judge something so short, but given Haiku's are meant to capture a moment in time they parallel well to images. The Haiku refers to the moment of some one elses death. The image he looks relaxed and not like he's just hit some one. However I can well believe it’s the same man in both pieces.

Score

6

Back to the other entries

Back to pandora